What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

HELLO

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

What has been your best sexual experience?

Sure no problem officer.

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

Hello I am 17 year old boy and I am interested in transgender why?

Yes sir it is.

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

What kind of person does a narcissist hate?

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

Do Marines really not need sleep during combat training or in general? If this is true, how and why is this possible?

{RING} {RING}

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

After a few moments he returns.

We white women don't like white men. Do you have any issue with that?

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?